Kuppusaamy on Bill Gates! 😉

Just heard, Bill Gates has resigned as the ‘Chairman of Microsoft’ after receiving a letter from kuppusaamy.
It reads:

Saar,

I have some questions for you…. Please yanswer them:

Namba wan) The keyboard alphabets are not in order, when will you launch the correct version?

Namba too) There is yeh ‘Start’ button… but no ‘Stop’ button… Rascalaa, where it is?

Namba tree) I have already learned Microsoft Word, when are you “laanching” Microsoft Sentence?

Namba for) There is yeh Recycle bin… but…there is nobody coming to collect that bin. Why???

Namba fife) Your name is Bill… But in India they orr selling computers without Bill… Why???

Yand finally yeh personal question: 
Your surname is Gates… But you are selling Windows… Why saar why??
😉 😜 😆

The Paradox of Our Times..

image

The paradox of our time in history is that..

we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers;
wider free-ways, but narrower viewpoints.

We spend more, but have less;
we buy more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families;
more conveniences, but less time.

We have more degrees, but less sense;
more knowledge, but less judgement;
more experts, yet more problems;
more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much,
smoke too much,
spend too recklessly,
laugh too little,
drive too fast,
get angry too quickly,
stay up too late,
get up too tired,
read too little,
watch TV too much,
and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life.
If you added years to life, but not life to years.

We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet and the new neighbour.
We’ve conquered outer-space, but not inner-space.
We’ve done larger things, but not better things…

We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudices.
We write more, but learn less.

(~ By BOB MOOREHEAD)

Lady, How old are You?

My job as Medical professional puts me in a position to go through the personal details of my patients and pose those questions, not asked, out of courtesy, generally.

Of late, I’ve been noticing, no woman patient has come to me who says her age is more than forty – though the physical appearance may be on the contrary – and, some of them are Grannies already! 😉

I wonder how that is possible?
Do they stop growing after that age is reached or it is a deliberate attempt not to accept the fact that we grow old?
And then, the bombardment of commercials about hair-dyes, skin-rejuvenating creams and anti-ageing lotions in media!
If Age is ‘Just’ a number, haven’t We forgotten the ‘Progression’ or ‘Maths’? No one is willing to accept the real age.. and accept ageing gracefully.
What to do?

But, why should I complain?
I think we are definitely a country full of people young at heart!
Oh believe me, I myself am Sixteen for last Thirty years now!!!
;)☺😜

.. To supporters of clemency to terrorists

Watched yesterday’s Newshour show on a certain ‘Now’ channel – not because I’ve suddenly realised the intellectual worth of Your-Knob’s show (I still consider him the biggest noise pollutant on prime time TV)!
It was surprising to see a certain ‘Gandhi’ give him the taste of his own medicine and hold the ‘intelligent’ debate to ransom!

I’ve read a highly-biased book written by this gentleman (i.e., Let’s Kill Gandhi) and, am aware of the views held by him so, it was a no surprise to see this ‘Later Day Saint’ pleading for clemency to a terrorist! What this gentleman was able to dish out throughout the debate was beyond logic and was harbouring in the domain of rhetoric.., dear readers, pure rhetoric!

He was able to prove the fact one can’t become civilized by just having a famous surname or lineage.., one can only fake rationalism through one’s inherited burden of ‘Gandhigiri’!

Tell you guys, most of these ‘Gandhis’ deserve to be dumped in Indian Ocean..!

अर्थ का अनर्थ

कई दुकानदार अखबारों को काट कर लिफाफे बना लेते हैं…

पर कई दफा जोड़ लगाते समय दो अखबारों की खबरें इस तरह जुड़ जाती हैं कि उनके मतलब कुछ के कुछ और ही बन जाते हैं!

कुछ नमूनें देखें:

1. अमरीका के राष्ट्रपति….कानपुर के पास चोरी की भैंसों समेत गिरफ्तार!

2. अमरीकी फौजों द्वारा इराक की जेलों में….चमेली बाई के साथ भंगड़े की क्लासें 23 जुलाई से शुरू!

3. अफगानिस्तान की जेलों में छिपे लादिन को….पंजाब सरकार की ओर से बुढ़ापा पैन्शन देने का एलान!

3. मुख्यमंत्री के घर पर….भैंस ने छ: टाँगों वाले  बच्चे को जन्म दिया!

4. अपने हरमन प्यारे नेता को वोट डालकर….मर्दाना ताकत हासिल करें!

5. अटल बिहारी वाजपाई ने ज़ोर देकर कहा….एक सुन्दर और सुशील कन्या की ज़रूरत!

6. तिहाड़ जेल से छ: कैदी फरार….भारत को ओलंपिक्स में सोने के तमगे की उम्मीद!

7. क्या आपकी नज़र कमज़ोर है? आज ही आऐं….ठेका देशी शराब!

8. बेऔलाद दंपत्ति निराश न हों….7 तारीख को आ रहे हैं लालू प्रसाद आपके शहर में!!!
;)😆😜

The Bengaluru School Teacher Whose YouTube School Has Got 68,000 Students

She wanted to do PhD, but because of the untimely death of her father and lack of financial support, she had to join an MNC in Bengaluru. But Roshni Mukherjee always liked teaching kids. And when she came to know from her maid that her kids feared going to their school in Tamil Nadu because of exam fear, it struck to her to start a school on YouTube that kids could access from anywhere in the world. This prompted her to launch a web-portal http://www.examfear.com and post videos for students of class 11 and 12. 

The strength of her subscribers on YouTube grew steadily and it soon crossed 50,000. She expanded the range of her videos to cater for students of class 10 and 11 also. Now, more than 3700 videos later, the number of subscribers to her channel crosses more than 68,000. 

Her videos include topics on various subjects taught on CBSE curriculum but she often takes recourse to ICSC books if she feels having missed on something. 

She has in the meantime left the job with the MNC as she started to get some income from a YouTube channel due to Google ads.Now Roshni wants to take your videos to the remotest part of India by converting her videos into regional languages like Tamil, Bangla & Telugu etc.

 This article is taken from The Economic Times – Bengaluru edition.

(http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/magazines/panache/this-bengaluru-teachers-youtube-school-has-68k-students/articleshow/48021095.cms)

 

Don’t get hanged for a Comma…!

That freedom fighter was about to be hanged inside jail. The hangman was about to remove the thin plank of wood that was the difference between life and death for the convict. The convict was Indian, hangman was Indian but the order to hang was British government’s… yeah, this story pertains to the Indian freedom struggle era. With heavy heart the hangman went up to the lever that would have removed that plank of wood. Suddenly there was mild commotion from the entrance side.

“Wait, an important message is to be received through wire … Don’t hang him till we receive it.”

It was the British jailor. Hangman’s hands froze where they were. Everybody turned towards the jailor with an expectation… a hope that the convict might get freed… he might not get hanged at all! A moment later, an orderly came running with the wire just received. But, what was that…?! It contained just three words… “HANG NOT SPARE” Communication facility was not, what it is these days and after much deliberation jailor decided to go ahead with hanging as the meaning that he had deciphered from wire was “HANG, NOT SPARE” … off course he came to know about his folly afterwards! What to do… a freedom fighter that would have been set free lost his life just because of a ‘COMMA’!

The second story is from late Mughal period. Badshah Salamat had noticed that his Naib Wazir (Deputy Minister) was absent from his court. He asked his spies to find out the whereabouts of said Wazir. By evening the reply came. It was in Persian that used to be the script of day-to-day work those days. It said,

“او مرد امروز”

(Who Aaj Mar Gaya => He died today).” Badshah Salamat was shocked to hear that but a bigger shock was awaiting him when he came to know that the spy forgot to put “Pesh” (the accented hyphen that puts in the sound “E” at “Mar” and he actually meant to say (Woh Aajmer Gaya => He went to Aajmer).

So, you see, what a misplaced stoppage (Punctuation) can do to the meaning!

In late 17th century, people started placing a common “Shiro-Rekha” (शिरो-रेखा) on all words in a sentence in Hindi. Now, try and make meaning out of following sentence from a letter written in that period:-

“कागदहीकेकारणजानगवायो।

“KAGADHIKEKAARANJAANGAWAAYO”

What do you decipher? This question was put to a “Dhobi” (A Washer man) and he deciphered the meaning as:-

“का गदही के कारण जान गवायो।”

That is, somebody (Probably a washer man) lost his Donkey (गदही) and died due to loss to his income.

Not satisfied, people wanted to consult a “Munshi” (A Clerk, or a person with literary bent of mind) as they were approaching his house, his Milkman happened to come across. Curious, he too wanted to see the letter and after seeing he couldn’t but ridicule them for not understanding a line that was very simple and obvious. It meant, according to him:-

काग दही के कारण जान गवायो।

A crow lost life for curd… (After being hit by the stone thrown by milk-woman to scare him away from the pitcher full of curd, probably …!)

People were aghast at the explanation. Suddenly, somebody noticed the Munshi coming their way. They just ran up to him with the problem at hand. The bespectacled Munshi, adjusting his specs, announced to the crowd, “Meaning is quite obvious… Someone lost very important paper and lost his life because of the urgency associated! You see…

कागद ही के कारण जान गवायो।

Till date it is not clear why someone lost his life or, what the meaning of that sentence is…! Everybody explains it according to his wisdom, his profession, his familiarity with one or other situation. So, you too don’t lose a life (Your or someone else’s) just for a silly punctuation… A Comma!

Now something deeply philosophical: –

“A Punctuation or A Stoppage, as in literature, is very important in life too, for it gives you to time to stop for a while, look around, look back, rejuvenate yourself… and then go ahead.” Think about this.

I know what you are thinking…!

“So much for your philosophies… Huuh!”

Ok, forget it!

Are Online Relationships Superficial .. ?

I am feeling a bit down these days .. may be because I have been posted to a new place of duty that does not have good connectivity with outside world and joining this new place was bit of a shock for me for my last duty station had broadband internet and 3G phone facilities available. Pertinent to mention here, folks, I am working with defence force of the country and the job profile includes a three-yearly transfer to a new location. But , wait a minute .. why am I sulking now? I joined this service with full knowledge of this fact! May be, I just am a bit confused right now.

One of the reason may also be being away from my ‘net-friends.’ No, I am not a very net-savvy person and large part of initial few years of my Facebook membership I was actually dormant there. I still don’t have close to 5000 friends there .. most of the people there are known to me personally also. I am not able to regularly comment on their postings or do one of my own there. Why only FB, let’s take this blog site itself. I created this site back in 2008, then remained dormant here for about six months then started writing on diverse topics .. irregularly!

It happens most of the time .. whenever I start writing I either get drifted into areas that are not related to my main topic or, loose interest midway. One may take refuse behind some fancy words like ‘writer’s block’ but, deep inside the guilt of letting your readers down remains. That reminds me I am yet to post an article here and it is June already! Sooo Soorry ..! I know most of you have been through this situation and have come out triumphant so, if you can share your magic formula with me … I’ll be indebted.

Again .., drifting away from the topic!

Coming back to the question .. “Are online relationships superficial?”

A word though .., Online Relationships don’t necessarily mean dating or matrimonial kind of relationships only. I mean purely social kind of relationships .. like those in your friend list on FB. This question came to my mind after I saw a lot of people doing regular trimming of their friend list on Facebook. Isn’t it insensitive on our part ..? We are able to remove them because we don’t really know them well and the relationship does not affect us because it does not have deep roots. I wonder if we could remove them had they been known to us in ‘Off- Net Life’. then why do we include them in our friend list at all? Attractive face ..? A mutual friend in your friend list ..?? Opposite gender ..???

Think about it ..

[to be continued]

2010 in review: My Blog at WordPress

The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:

Healthy blog!

The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads This blog is on fire!.

Crunchy numbers

Featured image

A Boeing 747-400 passenger jet can hold 416 passengers. This blog was viewed about 7,500 times in 2010. That’s about 18 full 747s.

 

In 2010, there were 21 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 44 posts. There were 26 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 3mb. That’s about 2 pictures per month.

The busiest day of the year was May 6th with 84 views. The most popular post that day was … THE DYING TERRORIST (POEM).

Where did they come from?

The top referring sites in 2010 were facebook.com, google.co.in, in.yfittopostblog.com, orkut.co.in, and bigextracash.com.

Some visitors came searching, mostly for september 11, spontaneous human combustion, hindi skit script, hindi skit comedy script, and 9 11 pictures.

Attractions in 2010

These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.

1

… THE DYING TERRORIST (POEM) November 2009
2 comments

2

SCHOOL INSPECTION (HINDI SKIT-FOR SEWAK DAY) September 2009
12 comments and 1 Like on WordPress.com,

3

SPONTANEOUS HUMAN COMBUSTION October 2009
6 comments

4

… HERMAN PERRY: THE AMERICAN SOLDIER WHO MARRIED A NAGA PRINCESS ! August 2009
4 comments

5

Myths And Legends Of Nagaland October 2009
15 comments

Some inspiring parables

Parable Number 01:

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.

A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day?

The crow answered: “Sure, why not?”

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.

All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Parable Number 02:

A turkey was chatting with a bull.

“I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.”

“Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull, “They’re packed with nutrients.”

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

Soon, he was spotted there by a farmer, who promptly shot the turkey out of the tree.

Lesson: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

Parable Number 03:

A little bird was flying south for the winter.

It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field.

While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.

The dung was actually thawing him out!

He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to the sound.

The cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!

Lesson: Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. And when you’re in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

Parable Number 04:

The boy rode on the donkey and the old man walked.

As they went along, they passed some people who remarked, “it is a shame the old man is walking and the boy is riding.”

The man and boy thought – maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions.

Later, they passed some other people who remarked, “What a shame, he makes that little boy walk.”

They decided they both would walk!

Soon they passed some more people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had a decent donkey to ride.

So, they both then rode the donkey!

Now, they passed some people that shamed them by saying “how awful to put such a load on a poor donkey.”

The boy and man said they were probably right so they decided to carry the donkey.

As they crossed a bridge, they lost their grip on the animal and he fell into the river and drowned.

Lesson: If you try to please everyone, you will eventually lose your ass.

Parable Number 05:

One morning an elderly man was walking on a nearly deserted beach.

He came upon a boy surrounded by thousands and thousands of starfish.

As eagerly as he could, the youngster was picking them up and throwing them back into the ocean.

Puzzled, the older man looked at the young boy and asked, “Little boy, what are you doing?”

The youth responded without looking up, “I’m trying to save these starfish, sir.”

The old man chuckled aloud, and queried, “Son, there are thousands of starfish and only one of you. What difference can you make?”

Holding a starfish in his hand, the boy turned to the man and, gently tossing the starfish into the water, said, “It will make a difference to that one!”

Lesson: Help is in doing, not in saying!